Monday, June 02, 2008

The Bible Means Just What It Says Except That Wine Means Grape Juice.

As you may know, I have sworn off booze until at least October 4, 2008. (Probably longer should I die before then) See, Away With Rum By Gum (Until October 4) I feel better, during the day, at least. I also sleep better and enjoy feeling morally superior to those who do imbibe as Young Art does driving his low carbon footprint car. Still, I do miss it. My views on strong drink are eloquently expressed in the passage below which is shamelessly copied verbatim from Lowell’s The Whiskey Speech. Click here to read the whole post.
My friends,
I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey.
If when you say whiskey you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.
But;
If when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.
This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.
1952, Noah. S. "Soggy Sweat (1923-1996)
Thanks to Vince for the tip.

I also share the views expressed by Alonzo Garbanzo in Away With Rum:



Willie Nelson in That Good Old Mountain Dew:

The Clancy brothers in Whiskey You're the Devil:

Tom Paxton - Bottle Of Wine

TEX RITTER-RYE WHISKEY


Tom T Hall in I Like Beer

and Shelly West in Jose Cuervo

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Virg,
Ya ain't got many friends now, you will have fewer if ya quit drinkin'.
Personally, I would much rather be around ya when you are half-lit, than when you are plumb sober.
Love ya man,
Hootie

Virgil said...

Hootie:
I've found that I'm not nearly as profound and witty as I was. We'll see what October brings. Speaking of friends, this reminded me that I left out Jose Cuervo. I've added him in you're honor.

Anonymous said...

Virg: has demon rum been out of your body long enough now for you to think clearly, to make an unclouded decision?
C'mon, be honest. Sobriety is a good thing, isn't it?

Virgil said...

Anon 11:51:
The demon has been out of my body for about 10 weeks. I'm not sure how long it takes to think clearly. Sobriety is a good thing. I had forgotten how much time and energy drinking takes.